Just stop for a minute & smile.

Just unfair.

2012-02-10T08:54:00.000-08:00

How the way you treat me with your friends is really unfair. really. Well, obviously I know you treat me more special than your friends but some part you don't. I'm not trying t ask you to always be with me or so. The feeling is so super unfair, when you go out w me, your friend texted you, you WILL ALWAYS reply them, ALWAYS. It doesn't matter how slow or late. You WILL STILL reply. & then what about me? Even though it's your "Weeks for friends" You just couldn't reply a single text whenever I text you. Yes, I'm pissed, super pissed. Why when it's your "Weeks for me" & you go out w me, you can just SIMPLY reply your friends. Why can't you do the same thing to me when you go out or slack with your friends? I wouldn't get pissed or what shit if you reply me when you are out or slack w your friends. Big fat liar if you told me tt when you go out w me, you didn't even reply your friend text. You told me tt when you are out w your friends, you gonna reply me when I text you. But what did you do? YOU FUCKING IGNORE ME BLOODY FUCK! Your words are all lies. Setakat nk sedapkn hati aku jerr. Tuu psl kau ckp mcm gitu. Kata2 kau semua kosong. Straight 4 days from Wednesday till now, you just simply ruined my mood, enough said.

It's a test from Allah.

2012-02-09T07:22:00.000-08:00

HELLO! :D Have not been updating my blog since my last post? Cause I promise myself not to update anything until I have settle down w myself. As you know, my N level result wasn't tt good & when I apply course at ITE. They just simply reject my application & course. Yes, the feeling is so hurtful, sad, regret, don't know how my future gonna turn out. When my course get rejected, to be honest, I didn't tell anyone. Except for, Farid & my family. Not even my friend. After one day, I told Ardilla. Yes, I only told her. Hakim, Wafi & other friend keep on calling, text, facebook, tweet me asking about my school result. I reject every call, didn't reply any text, & same goes t facebook & tweet. & hakim is the only friend tt who didn't gave up t give me a call. & I feel bad for not picking up his call. He called me again, I finally pick up his call. He told me tt he get rejected too. I thought, I was the only one who get rejected among my friends. But no, I was wrong. I wasn't alone. I tried to apply alot of time for my course, they still reject me. So me & hakim plan t take traineeship. Thanks to him as well. & tt point of time, family, farid is super disappointed in me. My family didn't show me how disappointing they are. But farid did. He nag, he bring me down, he insult me, he just crush my heart like a piece of paper when you dont need it anymore. Well, he wake me up, really. I regret for not putting my 101% into studies. Do you know how IMPORTANT STUDIES IS? It's VERY important. You need education for your future. No education, no future. So, farid didn't treat me right. Everything is just not right. & to be honest, no one is there for me. NO ONE. It's only me, myself & I. I fight for myself. I don't trust whatever & don't even believe what have farid insult me or what he says. Yes, his harsh words. Hurt. Hurts me deeply. Way too deep. Even if I say, I don't care it still hurts. Every time I talk about school there we go, quarrel. & his harsh words. I just couldn't say anything or descript how the feeling is & I just cry & cry. I didn't give up, yet, I stand up with my own 2 feet & stay strong. Went t ITE HQ for more than 3 times just t apply traineeship. & Alhamdullilah. I get this traineeship. I really thank ALLAH. I prove farid wrong. I prove to him tt I'm going t school, I'm not schooless & I'm not stupid. I prove to everyone in my family & him tt I didn't gave up no matter how hard my situation is. Its worth enduring the pain. Cause it teaches me a lesson.

Farid feel like fainting when I told him tt Traineeship accepted me. & your nagging is worth it. Cause you wake me up. To be honest, January'12 is not my lucky month. For Febuary so far so good, Alhamdullilah ;)

& Taaaaa-daaaa! I work as a SA at Bossini IMM. Traineeship is about work & school. Im taking the April Intake. & I have t work for 1 year t go thru this traineeship & for my NITEC certificate. & I get pay as well. The $$$ is the bomb. It's already been 3 days tt i've been working. To be honest, I'm not tired of working, I'm tired of standing for more than 2 hours even though there's no customer. & the feeling is so........THIS!

DEAD TIRED! Especially my leg, my feet. Like want t break like tt. I need a leg massage. Work has been fine for only 2 days. Kak Ita my in charge, didn't work today. & Anna is in charge for today. I kinda don't like her. Cause she's too bossy. Facts about me is, I hate people who is bossy. She keep on going to me & ask me t approach/help the customer. I know what t do. I know when t approach/help the customer & I know when not t approach/help the customer. You always see me when I'm not do anything. But you didn't see me when I'm doing my job. I didn't do anything is because, I've alrdy approach them & they say "I just want t take a look first." & Of cause, I need t give them some space & time t let them take a look. When I was doing my job, what are you doing? You were inside the store doing your stuff. Hahahais. Patience. I have to endure for 1 year. I sacrifice this for school, for myself & of cause, my future.

No matter how much & how deeply you've hurt me. I will always still love you no matter what happens. & I will never want to give up on you.

I'm bottling everything up. I dearly miss you.

Special Gift.

2011-12-27T11:09:00.000-08:00

So hi, whatzup! Time check; 3:50am. Still wide awake like an Owl. Hehe. Currently, Facebook-ing, Tweet-ing, Youtube-ing & Chatting. Guess who am I chatting w? My beloved boyfriend, of cause. Hahahaaa! I know this is lame. Who cares anw. Didn't go anywhere today expect going t love house. Just t chill & spent time together w him. Because its been one month didn't spent time together. Spent our time together in his room sit, lay down on his bed & share his story about his trip t medan. I didn't talk much or maybe I did, as I listen t his story & I keep on smiling non-stop ;D He told me, what happen at there. I listen t his story I feel very excited even though, his the one who go for his trip. Hahahaa! REALLY, VERY INTERESTING. He told me, how close he w his friend, he told me how spicy the chili is & many many many more. & he told me how fucked-up when some things happen at there. How I wish, I can killed tt someone too! Grrr! You make my boyfriend become hulk! K, whatever it is, he enjoy his trip♥ &&&&&&&&

TA-DAAAAAA!

He bought me this, at medan♥ Hehe!

& HE BOUGHT ME A NECKLACES TT THERE'S MY NAME ON IT♥♥♥

Have been wanting a necklaces since, i dont know when. & I finally got it from him♥ Thank you, dear!♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ & yes, he bought me long dress. I couldn't take the picture cause the dress is too long. Hehe. One day I will wear it & take picture & then I will show you guys okayy? I love all the gift/souvenir from him. Appreciate much. I hope you love the things tt I bought for you too. Had an lovely day w you todayy♥♥♥ xoxo

You make me feel good,

You make me feel safe,

You make me feel like I could live another day♥

So close, yet so far.

2011-12-26T02:16:00.000-08:00

HI AGAIN ;D Decided t update my blog todayy. Because I got nothing much t do. My all 3 sissy is not at home, they are away for holiday. How silent my home can be? VERY. Left me, mum & grandma at home, dad went JB as well. Hais. My life can be very lonely w/o sissy! So..............for the past few days I've been Facbeook-ing, Tweet-ing & Tumblr-ing. Didn't go anywhere cause boyfriend is not here! But its okayy ;D Have been listening & re-search about CHER LlOYD. MY GIRLFRIEND!♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ Uhhhhh, SHE SO EFFING HOT. VERY HOT. I kinda obsesses w her right now. How I wish I can meet her or AT LEAST take picture w her. How I wish.
Kinda miss spending my time w love. Been 1 month not meeting each other. Cause both of us are away for our holiday trip. We did, contact, yes. But not everyday. Cant talk t him so much, text him so much. But still, we made it thru! :D So close, yet so far. & it's 26 dec todayy, what does tt means?
MY BELOVED BOYFRIEND IS COMIG BACK TODAYY!♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥YES TODAYY! :DDDDD VERY EXCITED FOR HIS RETURN! Mum allow, me t fetch him. Hehe. But I lied t him tt I couldn't fetch him. It was meant t be surprise for him actually. So he called me last night, ask me if I can fetch him or not. & I said "No" His voice really turn t sad tone, really. I didn't meant t lied t you. I'm sorry. I hope, you will put on a wide smile on your face, when you see me at airport later on :D Please don't be mad at me, I love you♥♥♥ I'm gonna hug you tightly! Hehe. See you later, dear!♥

Much misses♥

2011-12-24T07:36:00.000-08:00

Hi whaaaaaats up! Like finnally i'm updating my blog rightttt. Been 1 month+ didnt blog. As always, I have so much free time but superb lazy t blog & don't know what t blog. Hehh. I don't know what mood I'm having right now. Listening JB's songs & updating my blog. Kinda weird right. So yea, gotten back my N level results on the 19th. Shall not tell you how my result is. Ask me & I will tell you! ;P So......my ITE courses is still pending :/ Worried much. Hopefully I can get in the courses! Insyallah, Amin! Mum is worried as well, but still got confident tt I can get. INSYALLAH! :D So..........................My holiday is Awesome! hehe. Cause why?! I went t Indonesia t visit/stay over at there. Much misses! 3 years of not meeting them is like......err, i dont know how t explain. You should understand how the feeling is. Everything change, those little kids grown up! So adorable. SO SO SO SO MUCH FREEDOM AT THERE & SO SO SO SO STRESSFREE! Yes, ofcause I miss SG. But not all of my SG family. Whooops, TO BE HONEST. I only miss my grandma, my farid♥ & SG FOOOOOOOD! hehhh! :D Went there for 2 weeks & it's not enough for me. Really, neither my mum & dad. If can they wanna stay longer but my dad working. Went there on the 29Nov & Come back on the 15th. Kinda miss my family at there right now.
& yess, every single day I get t play around w babies! hehe. Without fail I give them a kiss & hug. As you know, babies can brighten up my day in a snap & I superb love babies like aloooooot! Tell me how effing adorable they can be!! VEEEEEEEEEEEERY! I LOVE THEM! xoxo from my heart t your heart♥ hehe :D

So..................My adorable boyfriend is coming back on the 26th!!♥♥♥ I'm super duper sexcited for his return!! Swear, I miss you so much! Almost 1 month didn't meet him. 1 month is sooo longggggggggggg, very longgggggggg. Both of us can't survive w/o each other, almost dead! hahahah! Cheyyy. But really, I can't live without him. Hopefully Ibu allow me t fetch him. HOPEFULLY. Cause he really want me t fetch him. Hold on a lil bit dear, left 1 day t goooo!♥ I love you, boyfriend!♥♥♥

I miss school♥

2011-11-28T06:56:00.000-08:00

I miss schooling. I miss waking up early in the morning. I miss buying peach tea or ice lemon tea every morning before go t sleep. Sleep in class w piggies. Get scolded by teacher for not paying attention in class. I miss singing in class w my lovely best of the best friend. Asking them if they want & what t eat during recess or after school. I miss seeing my classmate quarrel w each other just because of small things. I miss how class can be very quite during science lesson & form teacher lesson. I miss how my friend say "Teacher. teacher! Phone phone! Keep keep!" HAHAHA. How I wish, I can still hang out w my lovely friends like how I used t. Things changes. Everyone is busy w their own stuff. Sigh. Honestly, I miss you 4dimond'11 & the best of the best friend♥ Well, I wish the best for you guys. xoxo

I just don't like

2011-11-22T09:20:00.000-08:00

I don't like it when you say "I will buy for you bla bla bla" for so many times. If you say 1 2 3x I dont mind, not 1000x but in the end you didnt buy it or mean it. Not tt im inpatient or hoping/expecting for it. I just dont like.

fuck it up

2011-11-09T11:04:00.001-08:00

THE WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD IS WHEN YOU CAN'T LOVE ANYONE ELSE, BECAUSE YOUR HEART STILL BELONGS TO THE ONE WHO BROKE IT.

& YEAH, FUCK THIS FEELING -'-

Misses.

2011-11-08T20:07:00.003-08:00

I SORELY MISS YOU GUYS♥

Regrets & Mistakes. They are all memories made.

If you ignore me

2011-10-26T01:35:00.000-07:00

I’m not going to keep waiting. I’ll stop bugging you, I won’t wait for you, I won’t talk to you. Simple as that. Yeah it’s going to be fucking hurt. But I’m not going to waste my time on someone who hardly gives me any of theirs. “Treat others the way you want to be treated”. So if you treat me like crap, what makes you think I’ll stick around?

Just disappointment

2011-10-26T00:56:00.000-07:00

I guess after a while of ignoring, we get tired of being angry, & instead we feel sad. We get reminded once in a while why we're not talking in the first place, but there comes a point where there's no more anger, just disappointment.

I want this t happen on my birthday

2011-10-21T09:37:00.000-07:00

I was suppose t update my blog exactly on 21. I delay it as I'm lazy t update on that day. So, today, 23 October. Tell you what, 28 DAY LEFT & IT'S GONNA BE MY BIRTHDAY. SWEET 16 BABY. OFFICIALLY SWEET 16! I'm extremely happy & I can't wait for it. & yes, I have plan for my own birthday, I bet it won't happen. How I wish, what ever I plan out on my birthday, i can do it by myself & surprise myself. It will be very great. But NO feeling as I love people surprise me. So yep, this is how my plan goes & the things that I want it t happen on my birthday. For ones, I want a surprise on my birthday. Since last few years birthday a bit sucks :/

To go USS with Abg segaff, My three siblings & Jannah. (How I wish I could bring my parents along)
If I didn't get t go USS, I wanna have a BBQ maybe at pasir ris/changi/east coast/west coast. That could be more much better cause we can invite other people like my best-friend, cousins & as well my family :-)
Or not, bring me some where I have never been before, chilling & small celebration.
I want a Sabotage that would make me as a memories & will remember for life. So that when I grow older I will smile to my own self when I remember those moment. NO HARD ONE. A MEMORABLE SABOTAGE. No egg please.

♥What I want for my birthday present. hehe. No shame. But really, this is the things tt I really want it.

16 Balloon. That can fly up in the sky & never get back. I want to bring every where with the 16 balloon & at the end of the day, I will go t an open space & let go one by one of the balloon & make 16 wish.
A small cake will do, at least I get to blow a candle.
I want t own a camera, I forget what brand. If can I wanna own it before I leave Sinagapore or before my birthday. (I will try t get my own self of cause C: )
I want an Adidas watch that I've been wanting it since sec 1. Yes, Sec 1.
A dress, jacket, shoe (GIRLS SHOPPING THINGS)
I want laughter's, smile, good day, surprise, lovable, memorable, on 21st November 2011♥ or in advance, belated.

This is the Adidas watch that I've been wanting it since sec 1. Exact colour, everything.

Actually, I want this kind lots of balloons. HAHAH.

Nahh, this kind of balloons will do. A rainbow one? Or need make & match colours. I don't want all the same colours. So dull. Those colours balloons represent,

"How colourful life could be."

Give me full of surprise. I will appreciate & remember for life.

2011-10-20T09:34:00.000-07:00

When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

And high up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Tears stream down your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down your face
And I

Tears stream down your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face
And I

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

We tend to say things we don't mean when we're hurt

2011-10-19T10:58:00.000-07:00

When you're hurt, you end up not being in your right state of mind. Your emotions get so bottled up, they begin to build up & then you get so frustrated. Sooner or later it will lead you to say things you don't think about before saying them. But at the same time, it feels good to just let out all the negativity you've been holding inside. It's the "wrong but feels so right" type of feeling when you say those things you don't mean to say.

Could you please answer all of the question that I've been asking you & waiting for your answer?

How would YOU feel if I just left you hanging?

2011-10-19T07:57:00.000-07:00

What if I did the same things you did to me, to you? What if I just left? What if one day I just decide to stop talking to you? What if I started flirting with other guys? What if I start ignoring you? What if I left you for someone else? Huh? How would you feel? I want to know. Because when you did all that to me, it fucking crushed me.

& Since, just now I ask you by text "How would you feel if I just left you hanging?"

& you replied, "Happy laa."

So I shall left you hanging one day? & you will wonder like fuck, why I left you hanging. So that you will wonder like fuck, why I ignore you. So that you wonder like fuck, why I don't fucking bother about you. So that you wonder like fuck, where did you go wrong. Cause you crushed me down like fuck. & I hate you so much.

People always say "The more you hate, the more you love."

& I can't deny this, "I love him even I hate him."

When I have no right to love him, when his no longer mine.

Why's it feel like he's there.

When I know that he's gone.

Why's it feel like he cares.

When I know that he don't.

That person you gave up everything for.

2011-10-19T03:58:00.000-07:00

I think we all have that one person that we would do anything for. If they wanted you to change something, you'd change it. If they wanted you to stop hanging out with your friends, you'd do it. You were like their obedient puppy. It's kind of sad though because, it all ended up being a waste of time. You thought you & that person would last forever & that's why you gave up everything for them, but in the end they stopped appreciating you & left you hanging.

This is what I've been going thru now. People stop appreciating me & left me hanging.

Even though I'm no longer yours, I hope you appreciate what I go through for you.

Are you happy now?

2011-10-17T07:59:00.001-07:00

ARE YOU HAPPY NOW, WITHOUT ME?

YOU HURT ME WAY TOO DEEP.

SUCKS 17th October 2011!

Keri Hilson - Energy.

2011-10-15T17:08:00.000-07:00

I wish I could rip out a page of my memory
'Cuz I put to much energy in him and me
Can't wait till I get through this phase 'cuz it's killing me
Too bad we can't rewrite our own history

Such a mystery when he's here with me
It's hard to believe I'm still lonely
Chances fading now, patience running out
This ain't how it's supposed to be

I'm having nightmares from sleeping with the enemy
How do we reverse the chemistry
I don't want us to be the end of me
This love is taking all of my energy, energy, energy
Taking all of my energy, energy, energy
Taking all of my energy

Seems only like yesterday, not even gravity
Could keep your feet off the ground when you were with me
How can two be as one? We've become so divided now
There's no use hiding from my misery, no

Such a mystery when he's here with me
It's hard to believe I'm still lonely
Chances fading now, patience running out
This ain't how it's supposed to be

I'm having nightmares from sleeping with the enemy
How do we reverse the chemistry
I don't want us to be the end of me
This love is taking all of my energy, energy, energy
Taking all of my energy, energy, energy
Taking all of

Now I can feel you changing me
And I can't afford to slip much further
From the person I was meant to be, whoa
I'm not afraid to walk alone
Not giving up, I'm moving on before it gets too deep
'Cause you're taking all of my energy

I'm having nightmares from sleeping with the enemy
How do we reverse the chemistry
I don't want us to be the end of me
This love is taking all of my energy

I'm having nightmares from sleeping with the enemy
How do we reverse the chemistry
I don't want us to be the end of me
This love is taking all of my energy, energy, energy
Taking all of my energy, energy, energy
Taking all of

You're killing me, you're taking all of me, yeah, oh
This love is taking all of my energy

I'm not who I used t be.

2011-10-12T10:07:00.000-07:00

I'm not who I used t be.

Why?

BECAUSE EVERYTHING IS SO SUCKS & FUCKED UP WHEN YOU LEAVE ME. It's been 2 years plus I never feel sucks & fucked up & it came back. IT CAME BACK. Maybe, I will feel like this just for the moment. I don't know. Well, I hate this kind of feeling. I want everything back t normal :( Im hurt. Damn bloody fucking hurt. I sound so emo. Maybe? For now. xoxo

Though, You such a pain in the ass.

I sorely miss you staying in my heart, yes, I really do.

I miss you, Farid.

Just because you know what I feel, doesn't mean you understand how it feels.

Life goes on.

2011-10-01T02:42:00.000-07:00

Hi, Hey, Hello. I'm back. Finally blogging! xD Have t admit this, I miss blogging. I miss sharing my things at here. I miss complaining every single thing at here. & mark today's date, 1/10/2011, nice date. & It's finally October. Time flies real fast. School ending soon. Gosh, I'm gonna miss my secondary school life time even though I've always want t graduate. I hope, my friendship w my girl-friends & boy-friends will last forever. Especially Wafi, Hakim, Hariana, Mas. Gonna miss Hariana's Love story, Irritate Wafi & Hakim. They are my laughing gas. Things change, what do you expect. Life goes on, what do you expect. People change, memories stays. I treasure every single thing in my life. Things come & go. Things get change after 22/09/2011. Well, what can I say. We are not mean t be together & things won't last. But it's okay, If we are meant t be together, we will get back again, in the future. I have t admit this, I'm officially single & I'm happy w that. Yes, everything change. This always happen when you just broke-up w someone that you used t love so damn much, you can't move on, you miss them & you still want them back. Well, you can't just move on in a snap. You need time, you need space, you need t breathe t heal everything. No pain, No gain. You gotta remember this, life goes on. You can't just stay & wait when you know things won't happen. Move on, learn new things, eventually someone will come t you. You don't need t search for love, it will come by itself, time will tell. So be patient & enjoy life. You still got a lot of things t do, don't miss it. I learn how t move on, I learn how t stand up & stay strong. It's hard, hurt damn much, it's pain in the ass. But what do I do? I DON'T GIVE UP. & keep on moving forward. I know that i can't just stay & wait t things tt it won't happen when tt person won't want me anymore. So yeaa, Just keep moving, don't stop & NEVER give up. Thanks t my beloved Jannah, Segaff, Best-Friend, Friend, Family & mostly ALLAH for always being there for me. I appreciate every single thing that you guys had done for me. Love you guys truck load♥

xoxo

Just cry a bucket & Move on.

I'm single & I'm happy w that.

& I'm not gonna rush back or get into relationship. I need time t breathe.

xoxo.

Even small things matters.

2011-08-08T06:54:00.000-07:00

Hey yaw! Last Saturday, 7/8/11 I went t united square t support D'zest. Well, i was out from house 10++am until around 5++pm i guess & I'm fasting. After all, it was worth cause D'zest Won First, Champion oi! I'm proud of you guys.

In the bus, otw t united square.

Waiting for the result.

D'ZEST CHAMPION OI!

D'zest says Hello, HELLO!

So, baby come down from Gombak t Novena t fetch me. So sweet of him right. Ya right, he will only fetch me once in the blue moon. But whatever it is. I appreciate it, even though he don't really wait & fetch me if we meet or going out. His always, forever late :P So yepp, after the competitions, we break fast at Macd. Our plan is t buy same shirt at paul & bear. BUT FAILED. He got his, but not mine. Well, he also like don't care like tt. Don't think any other way t get it. Berangan jerr laa nk ada same shirt. So..............bought his shirt. & Went back home. While waiting for the bus, he hug me as tight as he could. I feel loved when the part we are going back home. Sayang gile oiiiiiiiiiiii!♥

I love this 4 photo. Mostly the last one. Envy w his lips! Sexy seyy! Hahaaa!
Funny face means Handsome.

Meeting him again tomorrow FIREWORKS BABYYYY!♥

Fasting month.

2011-07-31T09:25:00.000-07:00

I love my boyfriend so much!♥

SELAMAT MENYAMBUT BULAN RAMADHAN!

nothing but you.

2011-05-23T11:21:00.000-07:00

Maybe everything happens for a reason.

Do you still remember this picture? I hope you still do. We've been not meeting each other for 1week 1day. Yes, I've been thinking about you too much. We don't really contact in the afternoon, neither evening, or night. Just a chat at Facebook & a call. Calls? We don't really share our stories like before as we always talk around 3am & the next few hours is our school dayy. To be honest, I've been missing you till now. Calls, text-ing, chat, doesn't really can melepaskan rindu towards you. Did I cry? Yes. Did I always wonder that do you miss me, do you even want to meet me & spent your quality time with me? Yes. Did I always wonder that, Am I still important in your life? Yes. I somehow felt that you are treating me cold some day. When the moment you treat me cold. I ask, Why? Why did he treat me cold? Why is he being this way? We ain't really like before. I miss the old us. I miss the old you. Nothing can describe how am I feeling in the inside right now. How I wish, one day, I could tell you & share with you how I feel about you. & You could tell & share with me how you feel about me. Y'know, like we are sharing to our best friend. So that we both know, how we felt for each other. But will this thing could happen one dayy? I don't know. I'm glad that I could hear you smile, laugh with me while you were talking to me just now. Appreciate much, that you made me smile.

I is missing you so much ;(

I will always love you for who you are.

"Oh! 3rd Week Of June 2009, Wednesday."

Things change, people change.

2011-05-22T10:18:00.000-07:00

Love this picture :-D Meet up w Mr Segaff today, since I've got nothing t do at home. It was last min plan. It went well after all. Had an ice cream. It's cost $5:80. Very ex right? But, it's nice & worth it. So, whenever we, only the two of us go out. We will always have H2H talks. Yeaa, It will always me or Mr segaff will start it first. But today, he started it first. Ask, how's life :-) So there, we started our H2H talk. Talked about something really personal. History :-D So yepp, didn't expected that 'Our history' is that bad. Real bad. I didn't know that you are that rude. Don't always point your finger t others. When you your own self has no good example towards people. Always look at your self before you judge people's attitude. Have you ever made mistake? Yes. Everyone in this world made mistake. Things change, people change. Don't expect us t change be like your generation. What has done can't be undone. Accept the fact that things have change. I've been living for 16 years, i know, I've still have a long way t go through. & for this 16 years. I've been bearing myself t watch what had happen t 'our life'. Yes, Its a not really good thing t watch what had happen, but the good thing is, I can learnt from it but not t bring it t the future. So here am I watching & learnt from it. 16 years old is not for me t go through such pain in the ass but t enjoy life. Maybe there's a reason behind it. I don't know. God know's well. I hope, I will always be the girl that who will always still can stand up w her own feet & stand up straight, heads up & smile. & go through every single thing in my life. Maybe, everything will be fine when you're gone.

I is very.... ;)

If it is good then why is he driving my heart insane?

And if it's bad then why can't I just walk away?

It's crazy how he got me lost in pleasure and pain.

I'm beautiful in my way.

2011-05-21T07:52:00.001-07:00

Hey yo, I'm back. Back again to blog. Since I've got nothing t do, besides playing game game game. I will just blog about today laa okayy? Ohh yeaa, Have been sick for 3 days? Tt's so not cooool :-( Give school a miss for 2 days I think? Sadgirl95. But not t worry, I'm already recover from sick. YAY MUCH :-D So, when t my cousins wedding. Saw Syahkir, long time no see bro. But I saw him, from far. How sad :-( Didn't expected him t recognize me when I'm wearing Baju Kurung & my make up on. HEHE. & guess what, when I first saw baby rean he was way t small. Now, his like a Humpty Dumpty! Cute ttm caaaan ;) Didn't get t take picture w him, cause a lot of ppl carry him awy frm me. Zzz. Its okayy. & I've been listening t old songs? Nahh, not tt really old song, like, Meet me half way, Whatcha say, Crawl? HAHAH & I have no idea why am I listening t tt kind of songs. I find it nice. Hmm. Farid is out w his friend, he totally frgt about me.........idk? I think so? He didnt even txt me. Not a single txt. I dont mind his out w his friend. But at least give me a txt. One txt is happy enough for me. But its okayy. Who really am I t him. His friend is always there for him. ITS ALRIGHT, IM FINE, IM ALWAYS FINE HERE. & He can take good care of himself anw. Big enough yeaa. & Mr segaff, Please get well soon♥ I will end it here :-D

I is so Sad ;(

So we'll crawl, Till we can walk again.

Then we'll run until we're strong enough to jump.

Then we'll fly until there is no end.

Before It's too late.

2011-05-18T08:26:00.000-07:00

Heyy. Have been not updating my blog for the past few months? This time round, not lazy. But too busy. Too busy with my life. Have been having a bonding time with lovely sissy & lovely cousins. I find my happiness when I'm with my loves ones. Yea, life there's up & down. I've when thru ups. & I've when thru down. But, not that hard yet. Still can manage to handle. Always pray to god that everything will be fine. There's no one who have a perfect life. Nobody in this world are prefect. Not even me or you. Every one made mistakes. Don't always compare me, or anyone to other's. When every one is not the same. Every single person have their own way & own style. It's either they make their right choice & the right path. Treasure your love ones now. Don't wait till it's gone. Now, it's not too little too late for me or you to treasure your love ones. When everything is gone. There's no way of turning back & make things right. But to move on & make the past as memories. I will end it here :-D

Sometimes you're up, Sometimes you're down.

Sometimes it feels like you're stuck on the ground.

Cause of love.

2011-04-03T02:26:00.000-07:00

“Even though I now see what a jerk you turned out to be, I still find myself picturing the good part about you. And that’s what makes me miss you the most.”

To your heart,

I miss you♥

From my heart.

2011-04-02T10:06:00.000-07:00

"You hurt me to the point where I cried for days. Yet I still love you more than anything and I'd take you back in a second."

2011-03-30T22:02:00.000-07:00

Heyy, In School Computer lab 3 now. Having English lesson. Was supposed to do work. But i didn't do. HEHH. Not lazy, but idky i cant find the thingy at Internet. Weird enough :/ Okay, this few days Ive been Happy + Sad & Tired. Have been sleeping late this few days, Insomnia. Due to some reason. The thing have past already so just forgive, but sorry, i cant even forget any single thing even though I've already delete your text msgs. Its hurts me. I never felt that way before. Okayy, what is past, is past. forgive & try t forget :/ Go to the new chapter. Life goes on baby. I'm sorry for everything. Now, I'm slowly moving on to change myself. Hopefully I didn't give up half way. Pray to Allah :)

If we are meant to be together, we will last till the end of time.

2011-03-23T22:04:00.001-07:00

I'm sorry if ive hurt you.

I love you, Muhammad Farid!

2011-03-20T03:52:00.000-07:00

HEY, Im back here again. Hehh. I know I've been saying tt I'll update my blog everyday-.- but i didn't do it. Due t don't feel like t updating my blog. HEHH. I don't know why, today i feel like updating my blog. How many hours t go 1 week holiday ends. I don't feel holiday, i don't feel tt i went out w my love ones all i feel is TIRED, yess T.I.R.E.D! 1 week of holiday is not enough. Tskkkkkkk. I only had fun on 13march, dance camp(not really) & yesterday :/ Okayy, dont want t talk about what really had happen yesterday :) Went out w frd, watch movie. I feel guilty cannnn. Im soryy : I miss going out w fam. Bile ni nk g ice-skating? Nvm, now im broke alrdy. Wait till i got money kayy? My money fly like a g6! Sad please, school money need t save. Starting from tmrrw, monday, i need t save my money. HEHH. I dont know what t post alrdy. Maybe till here. Ohh no, i just remember tt my mum want t confiscate my lappy again. No mum, please? Pretty please :'( Baru nk biaser kan diri update blog. SOBS. Hope mum wont confiscate. Nk update pki phone, tk syiok! Sigh! Till here. & I miss frd ♥ :(

Picture taken 30thAugust10♥
Trust is like a mirror. Once you break it, you can never look at it the same way you use to.

2011-03-19T08:46:00.000-07:00

Because your lies won't make me feels okay.

-19march11

2011-02-07T06:38:00.000-08:00

So yeaa, HEY. Im gonna update about the past few days kaay.

Friday 4Feb2011

When out with farid t vivo city. Accompany him go shopping. HEHH. When t toy 'r' us t buy his games. & when t Paul & Bear shop. He bought 1 shirt. So yeaa, he likes one of the jacket at there. Its cost 60bucks. So he didnt bought it. Save budget :/ Nvm, i knw this really one daay you'll get kaay babylove :) 4Feb should be cny right? But i don't understand why alot of chinese ppl at vivo :/ Are they having cny or holidaaay/shopping daay. HAHA. Just confuse a lil bit. Plan aftr buying his things is t eat at the kopi tiam( I think kopi tiam uhh. Not sure.) But i know its at the bus interchange there. & there's no place for us t eat or even sit. Saaad. Not our daay. So nxt plan is t go back t frd's house & eat dinner w him at his house. So ZAAAAP. Reach his house. Sit for a while. & taaaa-daaaa, there's raoul. After a while, ate w babylove. I love his mum cooking. I really do. The taste is just exactly like my mum's cooking. LOVED(L) Farid got drew my name on his drawing paper. Its sweet & nice even though its just so so so very simple. I loved it.

Saturday 5Feb2011

NYEHEHE. SATURDAY(L) I love saturday much. Even though we change our plan very the last min. Plan A is t watch kurafat at rex cinema. Plan t watch at 6pm! Took 66 bus. Reach there, straight away go t the cinema rex t buy the ticket asap. BUT when we reach there, we heard tt the ticket's are all sold out. ALL SOLD OUT. NOT EVEN MIDNIGHT TICKET IS AVAILABLE. Not our lucky dayy on tt dayy. Still, we smile. Enjoyed. HEHH. Plan B, played bowling at csc, i forget the place. Seriously :/ Played 1 game. Swear kaay please. I.HATE.THE.BOWLINGBALLS.AT.THERE. I wont go there & played bowling anymore. WONT kaay. Ones is enough. So after bowling. From i.dont.know.where walk t beach road & have our dinner at there. I ate mee wantan. Sungguh pedas. I didn't finish it up :/ Byk plus pedas. Aftr dinner, frm beach road walk all the way t esplanade. HEHH. Got funfair ehh. Wanted t take the top gun. But baru abes mkn. So tk jadi. End up, we walk & took picture's here & there. SO. As always its always me who wants t take picture. CHANNEL IMAN YEAHH MAAAN\M/ Abg segaff support me kaay please :D Aftr esplanade, took 106 dropped at wm inter & when bowling again. Bukit batok csc. Most of the ball go t longkang. I VERY SUPER SHAG. Tt's whyy. Nvm , there's always tomorrow. Reach home at 2am. & zzzz. :D I had fun. Really, not lying :)

Monday 07Feb2011

Sunday. Didn't go anywhere. Stayed at home. Cause the feeling of tired is still there till todaay. SOBS. So school was fine. YEAA. Ntg happen. Like as per normal. HEHH. So aftr school, meet frd. Was suppose t send him t work. But kak yatie called him & say tt he don't need t go t work. End up, i stayed at his house. Raoul was there too. So played with raoul. Laugh w him, gurau2 w him. He eat his launch. Aftr he took his launch. He felt sleepy. So i carry him & zaap, he fall a sleep. His so adorable. Aftr raoul fall asleep. I feel tired. hehh. Tetido kat rumaah farid :) Thank's t farid's mum. I love her like i love my mum. I love both. I guess, i gotta stopped here & take my panadol. Feel a lil bit sick. So yeaa, goodnight :)

2011-02-03T06:32:00.000-08:00

Thank you for always loving me♥

Heyy yawwws! Sorry for not updating my blog last two days. I slept too early. HEHH. Tired. Currently Fb'ing, Tumblr'ing♥, Tweet'ing, blogging, listening t music & texting Love♥. Yesterday CNY concert is just t bored. No lion dance anymore. The best perform is azri & friend singing & mavis dancing. HAHA. LOL with my lovely friends when the china's student sang. HEHH. I know it was rude, but, Its just so funny. Yeaah, school ended at 10:15am. So when back home. Stay at home until 12:40. Then change meet Love♥ plan was to meet under his blk. But then change plan stay at his house for a while. Talk to his lovely mum too. HEHH. Laugh, joke around, watch tv together with love♥. & yeaa, i dont know whyy i really love to look at him while his watching tv. Cute kaay please. How the way he really concentrate on the tv, cute. So, farid shows me his little, baby pictures. His face really look like raoul. SO CUTE TO THE MAXXXXXI! I swear, its totally cute. I manage to take two picture of him while he was young. HEHH. I will upload farid's picture & raoul's picture. The picture will be a bit blurr. Cause the picture long long long time ago alrdy :) So yeaa, at about 3:30 i send him to work. HEHH. Todaay, friday, saturday, sunday his not working so, i wont be going out anywhere accpet for sturday & sundaay. Going out with my lovely cousins. Camwhoreeeeeeeeee! Yessssssssa. Finnaly. But if only my uncle ikut, tk blhh amek gambar byk sgt. Cause his the type of person dont really like alot of things :/ But nvm, wait for BG! :) I'll stop here. Ntg more t blog about. Wait till tmrrw kaay, insyallah if im not lazy or whaat. HAHAH. Gdnite! & Happy CNY t my chinese friends :)

If you really look properly, Farid & Raoul look the same :> Anw, farid is sitting on the yellow car :>

2011-01-31T05:49:00.000-08:00

Hey yoooo! :D HEHH. Its has been long long time i didnt update my blog spot. Just busy with myself with TUMBLR I loveeee tumblr so much. HEHH. School have been busy with N level course work. I didnt expected that N level will gonna be hard. Really have to work hard this year. Left how many months only. Around 9 months? :/ Nevermind, i know i can do it! Yeaaaaaaaaah man! (Y) School without farid seems to be awkward. But nevermind, still meeting him after school. Sending him to work. Sweet girlfriend kaaaayzxc :D HEHH. How about April later? :( Worried a lil bit. *Jodoh tak kemane.* If we are meant to be together, we will last♥
Insyallah, Amin :D Maybe I'll be starting to updating everyday? Maye I should. Chatting with Jannah. Its always her. HAHA. Like always ;) Hopefully tmmrw morning wont be raining again. Please. Its already February please be nice♥ Okaaayzxc, maybe I shall stop here & eat my medicine. Im in pain now. HEHH. Goodnight!

2010-12-30T08:14:00.000-08:00

HI. Its has been long long long time i didn't update my blog :D Don't feel like it to update my blog after exam. Life has beeen great so far. There's still up's & down here & there. What to do, It's life. So yeaa, It's already new year eve & omg time files real fast. Really really fast. Im gonna update a long one. Idc how long. So yeaa, better be prepare to read my blog. HEHH. Yesterday went to MB fly kite & picnic with my lovely cousins & sister. I had an super duper awesome daaay! Its a swear. I plan it to go there. It was a succesful plan eventhough its a lil bit drizzling in the afternoon. So, we bought our own foods from home. While we have reach, we sit at the first floor under a shelter because the clouds dont let us fly kite straight away :) So, we are hungry we eat, we took picture's. Some of the people were looking at us. 'Cause Abg segaff bring some crazy stuff, face mask, sword's & lots of shade's & bubble's. HEHH. Crazy all of us :D So after the sun is back, we straight away went to the rooftop & chop a place. & yesss, fly kite! My kite, is smiley kite. It's show's that I should smile always even though there's is a hard time. Cheeeey! :P So yess, back to my story. Abg segaff bought for yummi A Big Penguin. Super duper cute. Its big & fat. HAHA. Guess what? My kite fly up up high, first. While, yummi's kite didnt go up at all. Because why, its faaaaaat! HAHA. Plus lazy! Got wind also dont want fly. HEHH. Yummi sulk when me & abg segaff sayy 'yummi's kite is fat & lazy!' Aww, so cute of him. But naughty :P After we fly kite, after mahgrib, there's no sun but moon. & idk what insect when up to our body. Omg, is so disgusting. Pack our stuff & when back to the first floor. & we eat our dinner as our food is still alot. & phone, ring ring. Abg Raihan call me up. He ask if we are still at the MB. & he told us, that his coming. So we eat slowly. & wait for him. So after awhile he broom broom here w his bike. & this part is super duper best ehh?-.- HAHA. Talk, laugh, took picture here & there. Suddenly, me & Abg Segaff went to water fall place & took picture. Suddenly a while later Abg Raihan came. He chase me & pull me towards the water. & yesss, my dress wet & my hair too :( Luckily i bring small towel. Wipe my hair to make it dry. After took picture's tgt, we talk while pack our stuff & back home. Took 174 from Clark quey. Guess what? From MB we drop at the wrong bus stop. & we drop at tanjong pagar. HAHH. Frm tanjong pagar can take MRT but we don't want. From tanjong pagar we walk all the way to Calrk quey. That's a lonnnng way walk. HAHA. Had fun though. Took alot of picture until 3 camera batt low. That's awesome! Abg segaff's, Kak Marni's, Jannah's camre when flatt. HAHA. I had an super terrific awesome daaay yeasterday. Can i just repeat yesterdaay? I knw life can't be repeated again. How i wish, I could. Now, time check is 3.30am.

I would like to post for my 2011 resolutions :

Change to be a better person. Be strong in any way & every way. Don't let the past happen again. Get good grade for my result. Study real hard for my N level & graduate & have a really really good grade. Don't depend on other's. Stop making farid & parents mad. Listen to him & parents. There's alot more. I won't type out. :D

Really wish officially to get back with you again. But I know it will be a hard way for you to come back with me. But I'll always pray to god that we will always stay together & will go through hard time, ups & down together. Even though we are not officially back yet. I still real treat you like my one & only boyfriend. But we're not in a r/s. I'm happy that I'm still with you even though we ain't really together. I love you more than everything. You are already my everything. I don't wish to stay far apart from you. Don't wish to lose you in any way or every way. I have known you more than 1year 7months. The longest guy that I've been together with. All those sweet memories when I'm with you will always stay's in my heart. Thank you for loving me like no one do. You are the best I've ever had. I love you, Muhammad Farid.

Goodbye Hurtful & Memorable 2010. & Hello Lovely 2011!

2010-09-30T07:30:00.000-07:00

I wont be updating my blog much. AS my exam are starting tomorrow & I need to concentrate on my studies. I've to screw up my brain. HEHEE! I wont be updating my blog until Ive end my examinations. So yeaaa! Good Luck people! XD

2010-09-20T04:50:00.000-07:00

I want to watch sunset.

I want to go to sentosa.

I want to go fly kite.

I want to go everywhere with you.

But everything will be after Farid' O's. ):

Heyy, Time check now is 8:37. Still haven't eat my dinner. I guess, I'm not feeling well right now. Having a bad headache & having a ulcer. Sick, Sick please go away. I don't need you. Tsk! Can I not go to school tomorrow? Aiyaa! School was okaay today. Accept for Mr Tan lesson. Fall asleep. Sesungguhnye saye penat. After school, stay back for a while as it was raining heavily. Wait until its stop & went back home.

Now currently texting Farid. Maybe after blog, I will watch TV. I'M BORED! Totally bored! Tommorow Farid won't be coming to school as he don't have any paper. I will be going to school alone ):

I'm looking forward to Jalan Raya with my lovely cousins. Sob sob. Don't tell me this year we won't go out like last few years. I miss those laughter's, jokes & fun. Ohhh sedare2ku yang tersayang, bile nk keluar raye ni? TSK!

Exam's are around the corner. & I still have not study a single subject. I need to study real soon. Gonna have a group study with my lovely friends c:

Alright gonna on the phone with my lovely boyfriend later c: HAHAAA! Baaaby, let's get Crazy! You know I know ^^ Love yaa!

& OHHH, I WANT A SCHOOL HOLIDAY REAL BAD.

Cause you're everywhere to me. & when I close my eyes, It's you I see.

2010-09-18T08:17:00.000-07:00

I totally love the picture above ^^

The 4R's.

Which one is prettier? XD

It has been days since I didn't update my blog. I wont update much, as I don't have any idea what to blog about. So yeaa. There's some pictures up there I took it at Fb. Wanna see more, see at my fb. I'm done here.

There's a million guy around but I don't see no one but you

Boy you're so one in a million

Baby, you're the best i ever had

2010-09-07T12:19:00.000-07:00

Anw, Its Wednesday 080910.

Ibu I want to dye my hair & buy new contact lens for Raya pretty please?

Psssssttt. Time check now is 3.28am. Still not asleep yet. Have been staring at my lappy since 1plus? Till now. Ohh.Myy! I just cant go to sleep. HEHEE! Should sleep after Sahur I guess? Will be a busy day until the 1st dayy of Raya or maybe until I.don't.know.when. HEHEE! I wont be updating my blog so often. Due to busyness. Will update my blog when Im free. What a great date, 080910! XD Goodnight people. OH HOO, Not goodnight. Goodmorning people! XD

I've been missing you this days.

Do you miss me?

I hope you do.

2010-09-02T06:22:00.000-07:00

I want Donuuuuuuuuuuuuut!

It has been long time ago I didn't update my blog. Due to my laziness & busyness. There's alot of thing for me to post about. But I'm just lazy to update a long post or I just don't know where to start. Never mind, I'll just post whatever is on my mind kaay?

School was okaay todaay. Nothing much happen todayy as School ends at 11:45. Last period is Science. Miss Hanani didn't teach us. That was AWESOME(Y) Didn't bring workbook also. Aiyaaa! I don't know where did I put my workbook. Gaaah! Nevermind. After school headed to ITE Collage West. Plan with classmate's not to go there. But end up we have to go. Being force by teacher. Damn You! But overall is was fun. Not totally fun. Tiring, as the school is so Fuxcking Big! I swear! Kalah Shopping center! AHAHAA! After the tour at ITE collage west. When back home straight away. Back home, zZZz. Sungguh penat! Text Farid that I've reach home. Farid has gone to bed earlier XD

I know I'll never find a a miracle as good as you are. The way you love so unpredictable wasn't on my radar. Until I realize that you were the only reason everything was beautiful to me.

IT'S YOU.

When I fall down & somehow get back up.

IT'S YOU.

When I'm all out & still I don't give up.

IT'S YOU.

When the clouds break & let the sun shine through.

Every bite I take tastes better.

& if I had to wait Forever.

Then I'd sit right here, I'd never let go, I'd have no fear because.

I found you.

I'll always still love you no matter what happened.

2010-08-26T07:21:00.000-07:00

I can't take this feeling anymore. I swear, I truely miss You with my whole heart.

I just can't simply say a single word when I saw You just now.

I feel like crying infront of You. But ohh well, I just don't You seeing me crying infront of You.

All I need is to stay strong. Hopefully everyhting's gonna be alright on saturday when I meet you.

I'm offically missing you.

Only god knows how much I miss you & need you.

I'm Pretending

2010-08-25T06:54:00.000-07:00

I'm tired of crying every single night before i go to sleep. I've been really weak this few days. I can't stand any longer. YA ALLAH, please give me strength to face everything that I'm enduring right now.

I don't wish to come to school tomorrow. I swear! What's the point being nice with me but then you @#$%^&* behind me. I'm sorry but I don't appreciate you. I hate you more then I like you. You are such an bitch. I swear! You ain't the person i knew before last few years, days, weeks? Ohh, I just don't know who you are. I just Hate for who you are. Lies, Hypocrites & etc. What goes around comes around. I'm being myself here. Thanks a lot, somebody. Jealous issit? FUCK YOU! __

I really do need YOU right now.
But I just don't know how to tell YOU what's going on right now.
How I wish YOU could feel how's my feeling right now.

I just need YOU to hug me & comfort me,

& tell me that's everything's gonna be alright.

I miss YOU, Love.

2010-08-23T22:56:00.000-07:00

I ain't ready to say goodbye, sweetheart.

2010-08-23T07:35:00.000-07:00

I'm here just to update my blog. Time check is already 11.24. I switch on my TV just to keep me accompany for a while. Maybe today could be just a short post. Not sure. It's monday todayy. & I don't really like mondayy as there's Mr Tan lesson. I get bored whenever his lesson time. So yeahh. Had MT first period. Half wayy doing work in MT class, there's fire drill. Pehh, terkejut. Lemah semagat aku! Hahaa! Then went out from class straight away & go to the Field. The whole school have to assemble there. & the weather is so Fucking hot. Pffft! When the thingy has over. Headed back to class & had science test. I guess both of my science test KO! As you know, I fucking hate science. & I just don't simply know a single thing about this year chapter. Can someone teach me, Please? I need help. I don't know whyy todayy I have one of a kind mood. I do Mr Tan work-.- & Mr Yap math paper(Y) Mr Tan asked to draw a mask and draw anything about how do you feel todayy. & He will put in at the back of the board. I got many kind of feelings todayy. & I don't feel like it to draw how i feel todayy. So I just draw a mask that shows a happy feeling. There's a reason whyy. But I'm just too lazy to type it out the reasons. Friend, You know I know XD After doing the mask thingy. Mr Tan ask to do another thing, but ohh well. I just don't know how to explain here. Whatever it is. The thing that Mr Tan ask to do, it's on my table. I paste it. Should see, nice!-.- After school went back home straight a wayy. Accompany mom to TB. There's something mum got to do at there. Ibuku lucu naaaah! Hahaaa! I'm just too lazy to elaborated. I'm done here. OMFG! I shouldn't have watch the video at fb. Ibu temankan Rafiqahh tido plak. Rafiqahh tak blhh tidooo! Ya Allaaaaaaaah!

Ya allah. Please give me strength for whatever happens.

I need you right now.

2010-08-21T07:28:00.000-07:00

Wasn't really in my mood. Todayy. I would like to update about Tasha todayy. Hehh! I miss those time when i'm with you baaaby! XD Anw, Ignore the picture above. There's nothing got to do with Tasha.

See the girl above? My Beloved sweetheart. Aiseeey! I don't know why i choose this picture? Pretty enough yeaa? Hahaa! I miss her alot. I miss talking to her. I miss waiting for her at Dg mrt station before go to work. I miss eating with her while we were having our launch tgt. & she always complain to me that i always eat fast!-.- & she still complain if i eat slowly!-.- Pffft! I miss her making jokes. I miss her disturbing Hakim while Hakim was trying to talk about his school subject at Mac Donald. I miss her dancing while we were finding expiry date at the HOT DOG/ Meat place thingy.(Idk what it call) I miss her disturbing me while i'm otp'ing with Farid during launch time. I miss everything about her. I swear! I really do miss her alot. I hope you won't work at the F1 place on November. I want you to be with me. I want to spend my time with you like how we use too when we were working. & Ohh! I miss gossip'ing with you about(our supervisor that, daa tua maseh nk step muda.) Ohh please ehh! Tua tak tua, Belah sua! Hehh! I hope to meet you again. I-L-O-V-E-Y-O-U-T-A-S-H-A!

& YESS TASHA! NO TO FORGET, THE MOST THING THAT I WON'T FORGET IT'S ABOUT THE HOT DOG THINGY!(You know, I know!)

2010-08-20T06:34:00.000-07:00

Jealousy Strikes!

2010-08-19T08:42:00.000-07:00

Okaay short post for todaay. Not lazy, not tired. But my stomach give me problem. Ohh God! School was quite okaay todayy. Don't feel like attending school tommorow. But I've to attend. There's some interviews in school about work. Gaaaah! & Yeaa. Like finally I change my blogskin. AHAHAA! I'm done here. I will link or Re-link you guys soon If I'm totally free XD

"It's not easy for me to find a guy like you in this whole wide world."

2010-08-18T07:07:00.000-07:00

Heyy!

Currently doing nothing, hearing songs & updating my blog. Will update a proper one todayy, maybe? Didn't attend school todayy. Due too my sickness. Ohh sickness please go away! Text baaaby in the early morning, last min told him that i will be not attending school. Sorry baaaby for the last min text. XD Baaaby called me after he have reach home. Miss him like aloot. Talked to him awhile thenn hang up the phone. Will be going out this sunday break fast with Enjella, Shabrina & Hariana. Enjella wants to break fast at geylang. I dont know whyy. Byk2 tempat dkt

geylang-.- Aiyoo! What to do? She want to go there so badly. Next tuesdayy gonna break fast with Baaaby. Don't know where to go. Haven't confirm yet. Sooo, I'm done here. Will be updating my blog so often, maybe? See how my mood goes. Goodnight readers! Baaby, I will post about you soon.

'The best & the most beautiful things in life cannot be seen or even touched, they must be felt with the heart.'

2010-08-10T08:38:00.000-07:00

Heyy. It has been quiet so long I didn't update my blog. I'm freaking lazy to update. There's alot of thing for me to share about. But i'm totally lazy to update a long post. Currently with ibu right now in the kitchen. Time cheack now 12.00 i guess baby have fallen asleep. Goodnight syg! Dad bought me a new lappy. Thnxx Ayah & Ibu! I love you! I had a super great dayy todayy & yesterdayy with my beloved boyfriend, Farid! A very big thank you for treating me movie ticket yesterday & temankn i tgk Street Dance walau pun u tak berape minat sgt dgn joget. Hehh! Thnxx baby! But the awesome part when we watch the Fireworks. That was awesome. But whatever it is. When ever im with you everything i'ts awesome baby! Met baby in the afternoon at around 6 just now. Our plan was to watch Dear John at baby cribs but baby have to do his F&N work then plan cancel. So we went to Bukit Timah to do baby work. After he had done his work. We play some game at the computer. Hehh! Baby sebok jerr nk maen girl2 nye game ehh! Tsk! & its your fault when i wanted to change game & the time its over. HMPH! But nevermind, you treat me mac donald. Hehh! Thnxx baby! I love you! :D Wanted to upload Raoul picture but then my Usb rosak. Nevermind. I'm done here. Wanna pack my things for tommorow morning. Goodnight!

Over 6 billion souls in the world, but you're the only one i want.

2010-08-06T09:35:00.001-07:00

Miss Baby! :(

2010-07-28T08:14:00.000-07:00

Won't be updating my blog so often.

I don't feel alright. Did you hide anything from me?

FML!

2010-07-19T07:08:00.000-07:00

Heyy, Currently playing Baking Life at Fb. Nothing better much to do. Baby went to sleep already as he was too sleepy & his pp8 is running low. Missing him already! Baaahh! Tomorrow gonna wait for him until his O-level ends :) School was fine today. Accept for Mr John Tan lesson. Super sleepy. He talk Like Super Alot. Almost the whole class went asleep because of his story telling -.- But whatever his talking about its true. Hehh! I was being hyper went math lesson. I don't know why. Okay, Jane & Maslina don't tell people what did i do! Hehh! Freaking funny lor. End lesson waited Baby to end his lesson & tutorial. & home sweet home :)

17 July 2010♥

Went out with Baby watch movie Despicable Me at Vivo City. The movie was so Fucking Awesome! You guys must watch. You can laugh your ass off. I swear! Hehh! So yeaa, Reach Vivo City at around 4, i guess. We booked the ticket first. As he treat me for the ticket. After we've book the ticket. We went to KFC for our launch as i treat him for launch. The movie starts at 6:50. We still have time as it was just only at 5pm. So we went to the rooftop to have some sit. Had lots of laughter's, jokes & many many more. Hehh! Baby likes to talk about Katty Perry. Baahh! Dream girlfriend! :P Jealous uhh! But HOHO! I know It's hard for him to have Katty Perry to be his girlfriend. So yeaa, there's nothing for me to jealous about or to think about. Hehh! We went to the cinema at 6:30 & Baby bought food. & Guess what? We watch the movie at the GV MAX. I swear, the place is so fucking big. That was the very first time me & farid went in there. The very first time. So me & farid get very excited! Hehh! First time mahh. Mcm jakon gitu. I really do love the part went we are watching the movie. Baby you know, I know! :) After the movie ends we sat at the rooftop again to watch the Ndp fireworks. But we waited there for so long, there's no any fireworks came out. So what we did is, we cuddle, chit-chatting, laugh around, joke around. Hehh! Baby you know what I like to do at you so that you could laugh your ass off! Hahaa! Then suddenly, went we are almost walk off from the rooftop there's a Fireworks near towards Sentosa. Thenn watch the fire works till it finish & home sweet home. I had a great day on that day. But eventually, something happen we were otw back home. There's nothing for me to elaborate that part. Whatever it is. That was the great night! :) I love you sweetheart!♥

I hope no matter how long we've been together. & It doesnt matter after how many years & months we've been together, I hope your love towards me won't fade away. 'Cause i truely, deeply, madly, crazy in love with you. & I don't wish to lose you, leave you or to let you go, Baby♥

2010-07-16T08:04:00.000-07:00

Heyy, It has been how many days, weeks I didn't update my blog. Due to my laziness. I'm gonna update whatever in my mind right now.

3 July 2010

Celebrated Farid's birthday at Swensens at Marina. As i treat him whatever he wants to eat. So he ordered what ever he wants & i ordered what i want. Don't really took many pictures. As we are enjoying our self eating, laughing, joking around at there. After we had done with our eating at Swensens we planned to go Explanet to have a sit. We walk & walk & walk & we talk & talk & talk & talk. We find a place to sit. & we sat at this one place while the weather is drizzling. We sat in front of the sea, nearby merlion while Farid holding my umbrella. That was the remoteness time I've ever had. Eventhough Farid was holding my umbrella. We sited there for a while. We talk for a while. & Suddenly Farid's confess to me something. & HOHO, he ask me for a Patch. After I've accpeted his Patch. Saaaaaaap! & there's a fireworks came out. It's was a perfect time that he asked me for a patch. Hahaaa! Didn't expected there's a fireworks came out. Actually it was an preview Ndp fire works, i guess? After we've move on from the place. Farid wants to play comp. But then every of the comp is booked by people. So we planned to go back home straight as it was already around 8. Reached Westmall interchange I give him his present to him. & home sweet home. Reach home. Around 11 or 12 plus, Farid called me & he told me that he is going to open the present that I gave it to him. He opened it & he was so fucking shocked to see the present. He truely love the gift that i give it to him. & I hope you would still keep it with you until you just couldn't keep the gift that I give it to you.

Lovely 03 July 2010.

Going out with BabyLove tomorrow.
Watch movie.
Baby treat me tickets!
I Love Love Love Love you!

Happy 1 year 1 months anniversary Baby!
I love you one & only you, Sayang.

2010-07-02T07:57:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthdayy To You Baaby Love!

Gonna meet Baaby tommorow, Gonna have a date :)

I didn't want something that would wear out or get used up. I wanted something that would last, something you cold take with you wherever you go. For your birthday, I wanted to get you something special. At last, I thought of something that is all the things I wanted; It won't ever wear out, you can't use it up, it will last forever, & you can take it with you everywhere. It's something no one else can give you: My Heart, My Love.

With Love,

Rafiqahh, Your Gigo-Monkeyy!

2010-06-22T09:40:00.000-07:00

Heyy! When out todayy! Meet baby! Planned to watch Movie at VivoCity. But the movie timing don't seems to allowed us to watch. So didn't get to watch the movie that I wanted to watch it so badly. So we went MacD to have our launch, as both of us are hungry. After our launch went to the Rooftop as I can't bear with the coolness inside the mall. Sited at the rooftop for hours. We joke around. Laugh, Talk, Smile, A LOT! & Ohh, we took photo a lot too. Hehh! & Yeaah, there's one part. We were joking around & suddenly Farid saw one Uncle wearing Soccer Boot! Taking pictures of her wife. Farid was so surprised & he laugh till his face red! Hahaa! Farid quickly took out his phone & take picture of that uncle wearing Soccer Boot. The pictures are up there for you to see. Press the picture if you wanna see it clearly. & I don't think so, they were Singaporean people. Hahaa! So funny. Sungguh Amazing! If you were there, you will ask yourself if its true he is wearing a Soccer Boot or not. Hahaa! Can't forget what had happen. Hehh. So yeaa. Around 7plus. Went back to MacD, as Farid wants to buy his Ice Cream. Eat while we were walking back to Interchange. Took 188 bus & Home sweet home. The Best, Fantastic dayy out ever!

Every breath of mine, advice to you.
Don't ever ever leave me.
Always be there, the way of my life.
Believe that, My love is only for you.

May our love last longer.
I truly deeply in love with you, Farid.

2010-06-20T09:32:00.001-07:00

I just want you to know, I really really love you.

Miss Baby badly!
Gonna meet Baby on Tuesdayy :D

When you left, I lost a part of me.
Is this so hard to believe?
Come back to me 'cause we belong together.
Ohh baby please, we belong together.

I love you, one & only you, Farid.

2010-06-18T09:29:00.000-07:00

I can't help it with the feelings.

Burst into tears.

Im sorry.

I love you.

2010-06-14T09:40:00.001-07:00

Heyy! Currently on the phone with My Baby Love. Hehh! Smile & Laugh alot while talking with Baby Dear. I loooooove! Tomorrow my last dayy of work. Yeeppy! Baby gonna fetch me. Weeeee! Miss Baby already. Gonna have a hug & kiss from baby tomorrow. Awww! Baby give me encourage. You know I know. I Love You, Baby Love! Hahaa! & ohh! I want you to dance like the dayy you dance kayy Baby? Hehh! Alright gotta go. Baby started his craziness already. He can make me go crazy! I likeeeeeeeee!

With Love,

Your Gigo-Monkeyy!

I Love You, My sexiest Hero, Farid.

2010-06-12T07:22:00.000-07:00

“ I think that when you fall in love with someone, every single day you spend with them, you fall in love even more. It’s like you find something else to love about them everyday. The way they laugh, the way they sneeze, even the way they blink. I think that’s how relationships last — when things are exciting. Every day you spend with that person is like an adventure into their soul.
— (via eletheowl)

Heyy, its been quite sometimes i didn't update my blog. Don't really feel like it to update my blog since i private my blog. Hehh! So yeahh. Have been working for the few weeks ago. Get to know new friends & new stuff. Its very tiring working but its fun to work. You understand me? Hahh! So yeaa. Have been going to work with Tasha. I likeee her. She don't seems to be the same like my other friends. I likeee how the wayy she is. Holidays are being enjoyable as i get to meet Baby almost everyday, Baby fetch me from work. Awww! So sweet of him. Currently missing him, damn much. Didnt get to contact him as his hand phone is with me. Pfft! Hehh! Nvrmnd. Meeting him tomorrow, again! Weee! I loooved! :D Alright nothing much to blog about. Gonna watch soccer if my sister found the channel using antenna. If not will be stuck in front of daddy's lappy. Daddy is not at home. His working till next morning. Aww, miss him. Moody with mum! Byee people. Will update my blog if I'm not lazy or if i feel like it to update my blog. 17June i will unprivate my blog. Okayy, Missed Baby, much.

You ain't like other guy.
I love you Baby.

2010-05-19T19:45:00.000-07:00

" I better find your love and I bet if i give all my love. Then nothings gonna tear us apart. "

2010-05-17T08:41:00.000-07:00

I love today date.

& i love for what had happen on this date last year.

Sweet memories.

" The love we shared and give to each other will always remain in my heart forever."

17.05.O9♥

This is when the love story began.

2010-05-13T08:40:00.000-07:00

" The hardest thing to do is watch the one you love, love someone else."

Didn't attend school today. It feel so awesome for not attending school. Receive text from Hakim in the early morning. Asking me questions. Bleah! Didn't manage to reply cause i don't have any strength to hold my phone & type. Very tired! Serve me right for sleeping late at night. Tomorrow have Ebs paper. Didn't study at all. As i don't understand a single thing. Understand a bit only. Never mind, hopefully tomorrow at least i can ans every of the question. Amin! Alright got to go now. Want to go lala land now. Sleepy! Goodnight :)

" I'd rather be hurt by the truth, than protected by a lie."

I don't seems to smile always.

But i'm a lil bit happy.

The feeling is diffrent.

2010-05-12T09:13:00.000-07:00

Heyy! Time check now is 1am still wide awake. Can't really sleep, have been sleeping for the whole day. Freaking tired. I also don't know why i feel super tired today. Maybe because of I've been sleeping late this few days. Had science paper today, i don't feel any hope to pass my science exam. I'm shock to hear that only 8 people pass math paper. Gosh! For sure I'll be one of them who fail my math. I'm so dead. No confidence in myself for passing my math & science paper. After exam stay back for a while only. Eat and went back home. Hakim didn't manage to send me till bus stop as he wanna *toot*. Hahah! Can't tell ya why, only me, Enjella & Wafi knows. Funny+Piaseyy lorr! Reach home, change, lay down at sofa & i don't know how, i can go to lala land. I miss dancing! I really do. & yess, i want June holiday to come faster, please? I don't wanna go school. & BIG HOORAY for me cause tomorrow i don't have any paper & there's no need for me to go to school. YAY! I likeeee! Friday gonna go to school alone as Wafi & Hakim never come to school. Due to they don't have any paper. Bleah! Never mind.

& Ohh, Thanks for the post.

You know who you are.

2010-05-11T08:03:00.000-07:00

Where is the Love?

2010-05-09T04:31:00.000-07:00

Selamat Hari Ibu!

Wanted to upload video sang by my classmate. Specially for mum. But i don't know why can't upload. Gaaaah! But never mind. I love my Mum so much! :D AHAHA! If i upload also like people will see my post if i never invite people. Bleah.

Ohh Ibu yang ku sayang

Engkau lah segala untuk ku

Ku doa kan mu supaya panjang umur selalu

Tanpa mu ku hilang arah

Tanpa mu ku hilang saja

Tanpa mu ku tak rela hidup sendiri

Senyum lah ohh ibu, Senyum lah ohh ibu

Ingin ku kata ku sayang padamu

Ceria lahh ohh ibu, Ceria lahh ohh ibu

Ingin ku kata ku cinta padamu

Kau lah segala untuk ku

Kau lah teman hidup ku

Kau lah kekasihku selama-lama nya

Senyum lah ohh ibu, Senyum lah ohh ibu

Ingin ku kata ku sayang padamu

Ceria lah ohh ibu, Ceria lah ohh ibu

Ingin kukata ku cinta padamu

Senyumlah ohh ibu.

Nothing really much fun happen today. Was being moody. Don't really laugh today a bit moody. But i a lil bit love in the evening & yesterday night. Get to eat a slice of Mother's Day cake yesterday. It's awesome man. Chocolate! Yummy! Then, in the evening went out with my mum & dad go to Mustafa. Shopping! Wanted to buy shoe but mum don't have enough money. I bought two perfume, one for myslef & one for Shabrina. & some of my parents thingy. Dad being funny just know. Bully me only. He wants to buy for me a nyonya shoe's for me to use. His being funny! AHAHA! I'm lovin' it!

It's hard for me to explain my feeling.

Your sorry can't secure my heart.

I don't want to put high hopes.

2010-05-03T21:46:00.000-07:00

I love you once, I love you still, I always have & always will.

Loving you, makes life worth it.

I miss you.

2010-05-02T07:40:00.000-07:00

I'm Sorry Besties. Honestly, I miss you guys.

Time check is 1am in the morning. Still wide awake. Can't get to sleep. Gonna private my blog soon, very fucking soon! I will private my blog until i feel so. Will invite some of you guys if im not lazy. My blog, my say.

What the FUCK!

I HATE YOU!

2010-04-29T07:51:00.000-07:00

Can't you hear my heart whispering saying that, I miss you so much.

Short post for today. I'm not really in my mood to update my blog. But since i feel like updating my blog. Here i am updating my blog. Nothing much happen in school today. Wasn't really in my mood at the end of the day. Due to some reason or maybe its just my feelings? I don't know. I'm not being me in this few days. Yes, really, I'm not being me this few days. I feel that something have change. Or maybe, its me who have change. Negative/Positives thoughts all over me. & why the hell am i thinking so much? Mood swing coming on my way. I need someone to rely on.

Can i hold on to my feelings & not to let it free?
I'm hiding my feelings.

Please don't stay far away from me.

2010-04-28T00:33:00.000-07:00

When I looked over my shoulder, It got a little bit colder. It's like I lost love from an angel & now I'm feeling like a stranger.

With You♥

2010-04-25T19:35:00.000-07:00

Monday, April 26, 2010

Promise my girlfriend to post for what had happen on last Friday. But i dont really have my mood to post right now. Sorry Gf! BUT i will post this:

Enjella Miss Her Mr. N

Shabrina Miss Her Mr.F

I miss Mr. Nobody!

I realize something after everything has done.

Look at the bright side & Be happy.

Smile Rafiqah!

2010-04-21T08:08:00.000-07:00

This is what I've been doing right now.

Have been not updating my blog since my last post. Wasn't really in mood to update my blog & there's no time for me to update my blog. School was fine today, but I'm not okay. Totally not okay. Can't really open my eye this morning. & my eye bag is big. Ugly! & its obviously my eye shows that I've cried alot. Shit! Nevermind. Thanks to my classmate for asking me to cheer up. Really appreciate it alot. Nikos is being funny today. He did some crappy thing just to say, 'Cheer up.' Even tough they didn't know anything. Thanks Yeah. I love my classmate. & yes, i love what had happen went recess time. But still, i still do feel sad. I love her. I'm not feeling well today. After recess, vomited. Eeeeyaa! Its yucks! Still feel dizzy after vomit & my stomach give me a problem. Sigh! Hopefully I'm doing okay. & i really hope too, that you are doing fine.

I can't help it, I really do miss you very badly.

I really do.

Only god knows how much i miss you.

Tears.

Stay strong Rafiqahh.

2010-04-18T07:41:00.000-07:00

Had fun today. Don't wanna elaborate what had happen. Tomorrow schooling. Gaah! How i wish there's no school tomorrow :D

I love you more than there are stars in the sky & fish in the sea.

2010-04-17T07:12:00.000-07:00

Had speech day today. Had fun. But abit moody. Miss somebody. Pictures/Video will be upload at Fb but i don't know when will they upload it. So yeah. Short post for today.

You were there to light my day

You were there to guide me through

Forms my days down & on

I'll never stop thinking of you

How can i forget all that

when you're the one

Who makes me smile

You'll always be a part of me

How i wish you were still mine

Never will forget the day

How we've met and came this far

We all know we got this feeling

But somehow it has end to end up here

I know it's me who said goodbye

And that's the hardest thing to do

Cause you mean alot to me

And guide the truth from me to you

For all the things i've done and said

for all the hurt that i've caused you

I hope you will forgive me baby,

Cause that wasn't what i meant to do

Seribu kenangan, Bagiku terlalu indah, Setiap detik bersama.

Anak British♥

2010-04-16T07:28:00.000-07:00

Didn't went to school today. How i wish its holiday so that next week there's no school. Nothing much happen today. Went to causeway to watch adek perform violin. Awesome shit! After watch the concert went back home. & i ate alot today, alot. Actually I'm not in my fucking mood that's why i ate alot. I was way too moody, very moody. Thanks to my uncle, untie & sister for making me laugh. But didnt manage to laugh like how i use to. How i wish, i could get out from each an every of my problems, it doesn't matter about love, family, me or anything. But hell yeah, i'm just stuck in one place. Oh God. Please help me. But nevermind, I will always be a strong girl.

'Cause i just need you to be with me.

2010-04-15T07:12:00.000-07:00

Not really in my mood right now. I lost my mood after School till now. Fcuking shit! Don't wanna tell why. & I'm sorry to Ruzaini for what had happen just now. Really feel very guilty. I'm really sorry. Gaah! I can say, today is a suey day. Time check now is 11:15. Currently chatting with Razak, Nuraisah & one of my cousins. Razak is being funny. Bleah. I ask him to tell me about something, he keep on saying another thing & give me a smiling face. Biol, tak betul punya kawan. Won't be coming to school tomorrow(Y). Losta reason why i don't wanna go to school. Mostly, i'm just not in my mood to go to school seeing people. Pfft! I'm being emo or what? Ohh, Bullshit! I'm not really feeling well right now. My headache is killing me. But who care's. Gonna miss besties & classmate :D

As tears of sorrow trickle down my cheek.

I'll love you faithfully.

I wonder if you really love me faithfully.

I just need someone worth my love.

I miss you, Do you?

2010-04-14T06:54:00.000-07:00

I like this picture.

Hey, School was okay today. Nothing much happen. Was so sleepy in class. Slept went Cme lesson. Mr John Tan talk till i fall asleep. Aiyoo. Too sleepy. Girlfriend also sleepy. Sehati Sejiwe. Hee. After school went to wm library do nothing. Actually we are suppose to study for Ebs test for tomorrow with Syazwani & Robecca. But then last minute Syazwani say that they are going to Robecca house to study. & ohh well, Girlfriend doesn't want to go there plus me, neither. So we went to wm library for fun. Around 3:30 walk off from the place. Shabrina & Enjella went back home. & i went back to school. After that, home sweet home. & here i am blogging. Currently doing nothing, just listen to songs & Fb'ing. I don't feel like going to school tomorrow & Friday. I don't want to go tomorrow cca & rehearsal can, please? Dont want to go to school on Friday just to watch adek performing at Causeway point. Bleah! Mum say 'Selapas kau gy skola, kau terus gy causeway point kan blh kalau kau nak tengok.' Hmph! Beg mum one more time again tomorrow. Hopefully mum will let me not to go to school. Amin! :D I hate Thursday lesson. Ohh please. I miss Nurul Jannah.

Memory is a golden Chain that bends us together again.

& If you got somebody that you can't live without say 'Oooh'.
& i say 'Oooh'.

Anak Orang British♥

2010-04-11T19:44:00.000-07:00

Currently in school. Having CPA lesson. My head is giving me a problem. Having a bad headache. I don't know why, in a sudden feel this dizziness. Hopefully i'm fine. Short post for today.

I just dont understand..

2010-04-10T08:28:00.000-07:00

I want to hold your hands & walk a mile
dont want to miss u even a while

My life is so beautiful 'cause,
Dear, its you, My life.

Hug me for my worries to die
my tears to dry and
my lonliness to fly

It hurts me to know
how i sometimes can be little selfish
when it comes to you

I am getting sentimental over you
for god sake explain me why all these

I miss you every moment of the day,
I keep me awake just to listen you,
I keep me empty just for you to fill,
I keep me alive just to see you

My mornings miss you,
my evenings seeks you
Where were you all these while,
you were not there to wipe my tears.

Fear of future is worse than pain of the past
still i bother the least, cause you are there

Even seconds are too long to miss you
I want to hold your hands & walk a mile
don't want to miss you, even a while

'cause my heart say so.

2010-04-09T08:23:00.000-07:00

I want to spend every moment, By your side.

Short post for today. Nothing much happen in school. I'm not hyper today. Tired, sleepy, bored. Somehow not really in my mood. I don't know why. After school went to near by block & accompany Girlfriend eat Maggie before their CCA starts. Laugh a lot with them. Enjella, Enjella. She's so damn funny. Don't wanna elaborate what happen. Damn fucking funny! If you were there, you will also laugh. Aiyoo! Sweet memorise, Girlfriend. & psst, My aunt & sister say that I'm fat! Whatever!

I love you for that certain smile

That cheers me up when I am blue

I love you for your tenderness

That warms me through and through

I love you for your kindness

And your understanding heart

The one that, somehow, always says
"I love you very much"

I live you for your faith in me

Your sweet and patient ways

For the many things you do

So often without praise

I love you for all these things

And for a million others too

But, most of all, for what I am

Whenever im with you.

I need you badly.

2010-04-08T07:15:00.000-07:00

Short post for today. Nothing much happened in school today. Laugh a lot with beloved friend. Not that so hyper. Wasn't really in my mood. Miss somebody. Tsk! Had rehearsal today. Tiring. Never knew Enjella can be so hyper by disturbing Hariana. Funny. I miss family gathering. I miss my olden days. Gonna buy new diary soon. I can't really post about something at my blog. & I've make up my mind to buy new diary. So yes, nobody can read my diary even my Besties. Sorry. You see that i'm happy right now, but you doesn't know how i feel inside.

You would not believe you're the only thing i want.

Cause you're everything i need.

Will the promise that you've promise,
Will it be fulfill one day?

I wonder.

I miss you badly.

Jealousy.

2010-04-07T06:26:00.000-07:00

School was okay today. Had PE for the first period. Had NAPFA test. Run for 8 rounds outside school & my timing is 15Min's 10sec. Didn't expect that i can get that timing. After running my head feel super dizzy. Almost faint. After school went to lot one with my beloved Girlfriend. Laugh a lot, like really a lot. In a sudden receive a text, i wasn't really in my mood after reading it. Was wondering. Around 3 walk of from lot one & went back to school to watch soccer. Watch soccer with Shabrina, Rafizan, Aisyah & Zulhimi. Cheer myself up by disturbing Rafizan. Show Rafizan that picture & told him that guy is my boyfriend. Then he was like, 'Nie mataer kau? Lelaki ke perempuan?' I say 'Bapok!' His face was like, 'Biar betul sak dekni.' AHAHA! Me & Shab laugh like what. But whatever it is, he don't trust me if that guy is my boyfriend. & yes, don't get me wrong, that guy is not my boyfriend! After watch soccer went back home & have a rest. I'm super tired right now. Gonna have some rest soon. Alright, Sorry to my lovely Friends i don't reply your text message's due to my prepaid is low. I will top up on the 10th April - 17 April within that day. That's what my mum told me. Tsk! Very long for me to wait. Never mind. Still can receive free incoming call. Till here only. Goodnight!

I miss you.

You're still the sexiest boy ever.

2010-04-05T21:38:00.000-07:00

Sometimes, i just can't tell anybody how i really feel not because, I don't know why, not because I don't trust them, but because I can't find the right words to make them understand.

I'm going to smile like nothing's wrong, talk like everything's prefect, act like it's all a dream, & pretend it's not hurting me.

I miss you

2010-04-04T19:34:00.000-07:00

Its, April 5, 2010

Being so hyper today. Don't know why. Currently having CPA lesson. Didn't do my work. Next lesson then i do my work. Had fun yesterday with my beloved friend. I love yesterday. Like finally i get to take picture with Izzy. I feel so. Don't know how to express the feeling. Short post for today. Will update my blog soon. Pictures will be upload at Fb. I want my picture with Izzy, Please? Don't be jealous :D

To be loved.

Patience.

Strong.

Wait.

Trust.

Smile.

Psst, I love Izzy.

I miss you.

2010-04-03T05:51:00.000-07:00

I'm not feeling very well today. I'm so cold. Did went out today for a while just to make my Ic. Saw Syahindah with her friends. After I've make my Ic, went back home straight away. While I'm walking to Bukit Batok interchange my head start to feel dizzy. In a sudden i feel like fainting. Lucky i don't faint in the middle of the path. Didn't tell mum about it. Reach home, straight away lay down on my bed sleep till 5. Wake up, saw my sister, her daughter & jannah were laying beside me. Continue sleeping till around 5.30 cause i still feel dizzy. Didn't eat medicine cause i don't have one. Never mind. I'm okay. Then receive a text from Irfan, My classmate. Blah. When my pp8 is running low there's many people text me. But when my pp8 is not low there's no one who want's to text me. Dumbo shit!

He say: Bila seseorang insan
meninggalkan sesuatu di dalam hidupnya,

ada sesuatu yang akan kembali dan membuatnya gembira.

Apabila dirinya hampa, ada saja yang datang untuk sedapkan hatinya.

Life, there's always someone beside you.

Be in my shoe & feel the way how i feel right now.

After you feel, then you can say "I understand how you feel."

I miss you.

2010-04-01T22:11:00.000-07:00

Its, Friday, April 2, 2010

Didn't get to sleep well yesterday. Slept around 2am & wake up at 8:30am in the morning. Tears after tears. Have been crying from 4pm till 2am. I cried till my eyes were swollen. Yes, i really cried badly. Very badly. I can't stand the sadness, hurts that I've feel. Only god knows how i feel. I just need someone or somebody to be here right now listening to my stories or complains. I don't care if it's a boy or a girl. I just don't really have the strength in me anymore. Thanks my Friend, for the advise & support. Appreciate it. But don't forget your girlfriend, dude! I'm having a soar throat right plus running nose. Gonna have a fever sooner or later. How i wish i will get the sickness on Sunday so that Monday there's no need for me to go to school. My elder sister told me that my face look pale in the morning. My eye bag were like so big. Wah, get a bad comment. Mum ask, what time i slept yesterday. Weird! Maybe because of, she saw my ugly eye bag. Never mind. I need Baby Deee badly. I miss Baby Deee! I'm enduring all the pain. 'Cause i can't accept the fate right now, but i have to. Agreed with Kak Lyana, I miss 2009 year & i don't think that 2010 was a better year.

Love begins with a smile,

grows with a kiss,

& ends with a teardrop.

I'm Sorry Goodbye, Love.

Imy.

2010-03-31T21:04:00.000-07:00

Disini aku menunngumu.

Heyy,

I'm in school right now. Currently having Cpa. Done my work & there's nothing much i can do. So i feel like blogging. & here i'm updating my blog. Wasn't not really in my mood right now aftr what i've seen. Ohh, well. I'm okayy. Thanks t you for hearing my complainers. Won't be going t modern dance todayy. Sorry Ruzaini. Heard something from mum yesterday. Im fucking sad. Its okayy, cause there's someone who still love me. Alright, there's nothing much in my mind right now. Will update soon when im free. I don't understand the situation right now. My heart don't feel tt easy.

You are the one who i love & i'm not letting you go.

I need you Mr Alien.

2010-03-29T05:42:00.000-07:00

I'll hold you and i love you the best that i can until you understand that i need your hand and i can't dance alone cause the beat's just too slow.

This heart of mine awoken by your smile, Mr Alien.

2010-03-24T07:11:00.000-07:00

Wooots! Currently watching some video dance in youtube. The loading is so fcuking slow. Nvrmnd, still get t watch. School was find todayy. But im a lil bit moody todayy. Idky, since in the morning i was moody till now. Mood swing. Nvrmnd wait fr how many daes, im bck t be Hyper, insyallah :D Slept around 1+ yesterdayy. Pfft. In school almost every lesson i slept except for pe lesson. Pe lesson we have t run 8 round outside school. I dont really run like how i use t run. My back pain. So slow jog wth Hariana. Baaaaaaaah! Idk what t blog alrdy. Ive forgotten what i wanna post.

Erasing Yourself From Somebody's Life Is Not As Simple As Walking Out The Door.

No matter how strong am i, deep down in my heart i have this feeling of afraid.

I'm afraid tt you will walk away from my life & ywcbtm.

I miss you badly, i really do, Inabhfy.

2010-03-21T06:09:00.001-07:00

All i can say is, I'm Missing You, Mr Alien.

Didnt went out todayy. Picnic was cancel. So sad. Wanted t go out & watch voguelicious at jp but i cant go out. Fcuuuk! Miss the funn todayy. Jealous aku zaini ambek gmbr nan voguelicious. Tmrrw, u r dead zaini. Hmph! Stuck at home for the whole dayy. Quite bored. Talk craps with my elder sister. Laugh with her inside my room. Never knew that my elder sister can entertain my craps. AHAHA! She can beat my record by otp'ing with someone till 5am in the morning. Jealous perr kak? But she cheat, she otp wth two ppl in one dayy till 5am. Aftr put dwn the first call. She had second call. Bleahh. We bumb on my bed for no reason, we laugh together for no reason, we smile for no reason. Okayy, there's a reason whyy i smile. Hehh! I dont know what's so excited about. I was not feeling well but still can fool around with my sister. Nvrmnd, i likeeeee. Tomorrow start schooling alrdy. Baaaah. Can we have another week of school holidays, please? I love today weather. Cold, raining & relaxing dayy for me. But still, im not that okayy. I need a bear, warm hug. My headache is killing me. Had super fcuking bad headache for the whole dayy. I told my sister that i've this headache for the past few months. She ask me t go doctor. Nahh, i dont want. Unless she gave me money go doctor thenn i go. Hehh! Okayy, i havent pack my things for tmrrw. & i wanna pack now. Gdnght. & ohh, i have ths thinking not t update my blog for a fews weeks, months. I dont knoww. See how it goes :D

It's Breaking Up.

2010-03-19T06:56:00.000-07:00

Cause i was so high, & now I'm so low.
& i don't want to walk around alone solo.

Yesterday didnt get t sleep. Yess, Frm 11+ i lay down on my bed till 4,5,6 am cant get t sleep. I cant go t sleep, what i do is, stare at the blank space & think of smthng. Idk what im thinking, maybe somebody? Bleahh. In a sudden got this thinking in my mind. I recall everything from the past, when im sec1 till yesterday. I feel so different in me. Very different. Lotsa laughthers, hurt, sadness, happy, loving. Memories. But the worst is, hurt. Like always. The worst is, hurt. But everything has past. Okayy, I miss my Girlfriend's & my classmate. I miss them saying "eh, eh si penguin niee." Rafizan call me penguin, tsk. Due t some reason. Shhhh! Secret. Paiseyy! :D I miss themm. Two more days school gonna reopen. But i still dont want t go school. Pfft. U understand me? I miss my Girlfiend's & my classmate but i dont want t go t school. BIG BIG BIG SIGH! Wasnt in my mood in the afternoon till now. Tears. He/she sayy, if you feel like crying, just cry & let go all the feelings.

Whisper to my ear & say that you still love me.

2010-03-18T04:30:00.000-07:00

I don't want to walk this earth if i gotta do it solo.

Heyy!

Life have been not as cheerful as before. There's nothing got t do wth, r'ship or whaaaaat, maybe. Ohh God! How i wish i could turn back time. School holiday is so fcuking bored, accpt fr _____. :DD 3 more days school is gonna reopen. Gaaaaaaaah! I dont want go school, please? I dont feel like going t school. Dont ask me why, Thank you! :D Cme & Ve project havent done yet, nt even a single thing. I dont care. Currently chatting wth Ahh Meng, Fb'ing, Listen songs & watch Tom&Jerry. Bored! Saturday will be going out, With my bitches. Weee! Meeting Jannah soon, YAAAY! Miss her truckloads, but ohh, everything have change nt t be the way we always do. She told me tt she have a letter fr me. Wondering what issit. Hopefully this sundayy there will be a family gathering at Changi, picnic. But hell yeahh, Im not going t mandi air laut. If not i will be black. Hehh! Need t study soon, very soon. & i dont knw when can we start group studying. Pfft! Ahhh Meng is very annoying bustard. Okayy, till here only. Im huuuuuuuuuuuungry! :D

Stay strong is all i need.

Be patience is what i have.

Understand the situtation right now.

Smile is all i need to do.

Ohh Baby, I be stuck to you, Like glue baby, Wanna spend it all on you, Baby.

I need you, I miss you, I want you & I love you, Mr Alien.

2010-03-15T07:49:00.000-07:00

Live the life you want to live.

Be the person you want to remember.

Make decision, make mistakes.

If you fall, at least you tried.

Life cant rewind.

Will post a proper want next time :D

2010-03-12T06:48:00.000-08:00

Heyy,

Currently listening t songs while chatting with Celine. So yeahh, school was fine todayy. I dont feel like going t school in the morning cause my stomach hurts alot. I cant even walk properly in the morning aftr i've wake up. My stomach really hurts alot, like super hurt. I force myself t walk & get up. If not because of getting bck my report slip & i have t bring t schhol D'zest dress, i wont come t school. Tsk! But nvrmnd. Had assembly talk todayy. Bored. But great! Only have a fews mins of Science lesson. I almost fall asleep when Miss Hanani talk about something, i dont listen at all. Cause im wayy t sleepy & tired. Aftr Science had English lesson for 1 period, i fall asleep. Hehh! Too tired alrdy. Same goes t Hariana too. She fall asleep. Aiyaa! So aftr recess, Mr tan came t our class t give bck our report slip. & Alhamdulliah. I pass! Yaaaay! Im happy with my results. Only get 1 U grade which is Science. Like finally, i pass my Math. Weee! Hopefully i will improve more when the next test/exam. Aftr school, slack with Besties until around 2 i guess. Went bck school tgt & we went our separate way. I went up t the hall straight away. Meet D'zest in the hall. & they have their full dress rehersal. They dance fr 2-3 times & done. One by one went bck home accpt, me, zaini, marlina & celine styed in the hall. Aftr a few mins ltr i dont feel comfortable sitting in the hall. I swear. Force Zaini & Marlina t get out of the hall asap. I feel so much better went we walk off frm the hall. :DD Tomorrw gonna meet D'zest at lot1 by 6.30am will be having breakfirst at there. Quite nervous fr tmrrw, eventhough im just the reserved. All the best D'zest! Spirit Soar Higher, Go Go Go, D'ZEST!

& Ohh! Happy Advance Bdae, Ruzaini! :D

I need you like a hearts needs a beat.

I miss you badly, SL.

2010-03-10T07:27:00.000-08:00

A memorable date 10.03.09.

School wasnt fine. Actually its not the school that is not fine but im the one who is not fine. I feel so suey todayy. Firstly in the morning get scolded from mum. Secondly, i have t change sit wth Jane & i cant sit beside Shabrina & Haziq anymore.Thirdly, get scolded from Mrs Hazel Lee & Mr John Tan. Fourthly, i almost fall on the stairs infront of ppl. Fifth, i have t carry a heavy school bag everywhere i go. Sixth, im falling sick & my whole body is aching. Seven, when im going t school, gt this guy, tt i dont like, is stalking me from behind. Eight, someting happend at home. Nine, dont wanna say. I feel so fucked up todayy. Its feels like, "ARGH!" & i dont know what the hell is happening t me. Sigh! I dont even have any mood. My mood is around 15% out of 100%. & i wonder something, "why?" & thank you, My friend fr the advise. Psst, i feel weird towards this person.

Every of my post there's nothing got t do with my ex's.
But there's got t do with someone.

I miss you badly, i really do, but i don't know if you does.
I'm Sorry "SL", I'm sorry.

My heart don't feel peace at all.

2010-03-09T06:47:00.000-08:00

Psst,

Im not in my mood, im not fine & im not okayy, totally. But nvrmnd, i dont care! Im strong! I still got somebody who cheer me up. But still, ________. I wasn't in my mood frm morning. So yeahh. Had fun todayy wth my crazy classmate. Aiyaa! I love todayy lessons including dance practice. But i dont love todayy. Understand? I love todayy lesson but i dont love todayy. Tsk!

How i wish i could express my feeling at here or somewhere or t someone/somebody.

But whatever it is, Im smiling right now. I dont know whyy :DD

Gdnght, Dream Love.
Imy.

2010-03-08T06:29:00.000-08:00

Heyy!

Currently listening t songs & texting Ahhh Meng. So sudden uhh this Ahh Meng text me. & dont think other wayy, we are friends only. School was super fine todayy accpt Dance work. Took bus 188 todayy. Idky, i feel lazy t walk till wm inter bs. Meet shabrina & the rest in school. Get a Love letter in the morning by Dearest. Smiling away while reading it. She ask me not read in school. But ohh too bad, at the parade square i read it. Sweet huhh. Im in my mood fr the whole dayy in school. Aftr school had Learder Ship programme. Go for a while till 4 & off t hall fr the Dance work thingy. If i knw the Dance work will spoil my fcuking mood, i will never go, i swear. I rather sty in class with my crazy classmate then going t ths Dance works thingy. I dont feel like going fr the next training. But its a must. Tsk! Aftr dance when bck hm straight away. I was not in my mood aftr the dance till now, maybe? I was mad with my elder sister. I dont wanna talk about it. 'Muuuum, i dont want akak t sleep in my room cann? Please?'
There's a reason. Almost everyday in class i sleep, bcause of my sister. Ppl wake up at around 5,6,7 in the morning i woke up at 4am. Bitch herr! I wanna beg dad/mum t ask her sleep outside, i dont care. Alrght, im dont here. Gdnght, Dearest.

I don't understand & i don't know what's happening.

2010-03-07T07:00:00.001-08:00

Had Fun Today.

Will update next time, if im free.

Im addicted to Dance.

Let's Rock & Roll, Baby.

2010-03-05T08:21:00.001-08:00

Heyy.

Time check now is 1:30am. Still wide awake. I cant sleep. My goodness.

I dont know whyy. School was fine todae, not really. I wasnt in my mood since in the morning till now. Its not only today tt i dont have my mood, it has been fr the past few daes i dont have any mood, like totally. Dosent mean i smile, i laugh there's nothing happen. I myself dont know why i dont have any mood Or maybe because of what ive been thinking of this few daes. Arghh, have t stop thinking & be the real me back. The sadness tt i still have in me is bothering me or maybe something is just bothering me. I dont alwaes cheer myself up, i dont use t smile as wide as before, i dont use t laugh like how i always do, i dont use t talk like how i use t talk & i dont really have the happiness like before. What i do is Wondering why am i still feeling sad & lot's more. I am sorry t this person fr spoiling your mood just now. Im really sorry. I've been putting a fake smile on my face fr a long time. No, i cant always be in this wayy. Till when i want t be moody & put a fake smile on my face just t show t someone, people tt im fine. But in the real, im totally not okayy & im totally not fine at all. I've been hiding all this feeling since last two/three months. I almost fall & give up but i still do stand up by my own & not t give up tt easily. I knw, im strong enough t face everything tt im facing rght now. As days goes by, things aint getting better. Things changes not t be the wayy i want it t be. Ohh, God. I'm in pain & i'm feeling down. Do you know what it feels like?

Sa Rang Hae Yo.

2010-03-04T07:08:00.000-08:00

I wasnt in my mood since in the early morning. Should i post why i wasnt in my mood? Maybe Nooo. I just kept it t myself.

Every of my post there's gt t do wth you.